Weddings Weirdo's and Wisecracks
by IamTheBlaze
Summary: The third in the B.O.W series, commonly know as the Bows brothers and Broken hearts series. Join Jex Stark for yet another adventure into the world of criminals, annoying shield agents and the internet. Watch her fight alongside her brother and best friends and she plans the Hen party to outlast all Hen parties and attempts to get the worlds most eligible bachelor down the aisle.
1. Prologue!

_**Report**_

That one word was the result of two hours effort, staring at my computer a blank word document up ready to write. Of course that was after half an hour's work deciding on the perfect font, title and colour. Or at least that was before someone had thoughtfully decided to give me the instructions from Fury that my report was to completed in size eleven Calibri in no other colour than standard black. I know, after all the effort I had put into my rainbow lettering as well. The phrase if looks could kill ran through my mind more than once. But then again when dealing with trained shield agents, the person whose most likely to end up dead… Is me. Anyway the reason this report was stressing me out so much was because unlike my usual reports where I could get away with writing, it was all Loki's fault. This report was to be a long one, detailing the last two years of my life. With actual sentences. Or at least that's what Fury said to me when he gave me the assignment and two weeks to do it, I mean come on people I'm not illiterate, I can write actual sentences, but why do something boring and time wasting when you can pay someone else to do it. And besides, seriously someone explain to me how does one condense two years, 730 days, 17531.6 hours, 1,051,897.53 minutes and 63, 072, 00 seconds into a few hundred words. There's a reason barely anyone writes their own autobiography. And it's not just because their to scared to write bad things about all the people they secretly hate. I mean in those 63, 072, 00 seconds I'd managed to get accepted into one of the world's most to secrets organizations, find the love of my life, get kidnapped by the demi-god who later became my best friend, avenged my parents murderer, go rouge with my best friend, be rejoin the same organization I went rouge from, place an entire battle station into lockdown, interrogate a few prisoners, get kidnapped by an evil guy named Jacob. Participate in arranged fight between the world's best superhero's and win. Pass the term after only showing up for a week. And somehow graduate top of my class, which I had a sneaking suspicion had something to do with the new Stark wing in our library. Unfortunately though graduating at the top of my class meant I had to give a valedictory speech. And barely showing up for school meant I didn't exactly have much to reminisce upon, unless they were going to let me talk about all the bad guys I'd helped put behind bars and somehow tie that into a school theme? Actually that might just work. You can metaphorically say that all the bad guys I put behind bars are like students locking up the demons of distraction that hinder their future! I've got this speech in the bag. Or that's what I thought until I saw the note Cap had left me thoughtfully attached to my wall. 'No talking about the Avengers'. Well there goes that plan. I mean seriously did these guys want me to ever get this report done. After all a lot can happen in 63, 072, 00 seconds. And most of which I can't put in this report because if It's not already illegal. It probably should be.

* * *

**And so we begin again, **

**I expect some reviews even if it is only the prologue! **

**Blaze!**


	2. Graduation!

**The bit underlined is just Jex's speech, pretty average so skip over it if you feel like it. **

* * *

The big day had come. We were now in the back of the concert hall. Sammi and I were fixing each others hair. Ignoring our teachers role calls of 'Stark, Tate,!" My classmates were all ready with their equipment; each bearing dresses, gowns and had on their matching caps. I looked out into the half-filled seats that lined the left side of the concert hall. Sure enough, there was my brother, the Tony Stark, walking casually to the seats. He was wearing another navy blue dress suit with a matching red tie. His eyes were hidden behind a pair of shades and his hair was gelled into place. Walking beside him were the avengers, I shook my head. They all looked a right statement. Cap, Bruce, Hawkeye, Thor and Loki were in suits, Natasha in a short leopard print dress and Ally was in a gorgeous dress magenta dress paired off with a pair of killer heels. Behind them walked both Pepper and Hogan. Pepper in her usual business like but quite fashionable black skirt with a blouse and an over coat, along with her usual hair bun and high heels. Hogan had his "Men In Black" look going…nothing new. The nine of them stuck out like a sore thumb as they made their way calmly over to the chairs.

Completely ignoring the crowd's hysteria over their arrival, the seven of them sat down in the centre section of the front row. I was surprised that no one had attacked Tony yet. Maybe because the crowd figured it was a school event and didn't want to cause any trouble? The hysteria, slowly but surely, died down, however.

My classmates were now frozen, staring at me. Some of them with wide grins yet a few individuals glared as if they had never witnessed something so repulsive. I grinned at them. Using my, That's right. After today I inherit my half of a multi-million dollar empire. You should be jealous smile. "Hey guys!" I shouted . "Tony! Pepper! Hogan! Steve! Bruce! Clint! Over here!" I had to stop my self from calling out Thor's name as tried to get their attention by different forms of waving and jumping up and down.

It was Tony who noticed me first. "Hey! There's our graduate!" He shouted, pointing at me, and nudging both Steve and Clint who were looking at the opposite side of the room. There was a long line of nudging in the first row until all of the Avengers were grinning at me. Cap waved to me while Clint gave me the blew me a kiss and screamed, "Lookin' good there Little Starky!" I rolled my eyes at that last comment. The crowd sat there, anxiously watching this scene. My classmates (the supportive few) giggled uncontrollably.

"You ready?" Sammi asked me with a nervous grin. I rolled my eyes affectionately.

"To leave this hell hole yes. To go out in the real world. Hell No."

"At least you've got a job." Sammi said casting a look around us. "I have no-idea what I'm going to do with the rest of my life." I grinned,

"If you get stuck I'll be happy to offer you a job as my cleaning lady at Stark Industries," she rolled her eyes.

"Ha Ha it's all very funny for the super star Heiress with the million dollar company. "

"Ya know it." I grinned. "But seriously, we're going to be fine. I promise." Sammi visibly relaxed casting an eye around at our surroundings.

"It's funny I never thought I'd miss this place."

"I know. Sometimes you realise that the things that bring people closest together is the battle trying to survive the war wagged in this hell hole." Sammi grinned. "Sounds like it's time. You ready?" I asked glancing at my best friend.

"You Jump I Jump right?" She asked with a smile that I immediately returned. We had been asking each other that question since we had watched the titanic as kids.

"Of course," Was my reply. "When have I ever jumped without you." We grinned at each other before making our way into the processional and marching throw the rows on to the stage. I grinned as the avengers wolf whistled and cat called to me. Giving Tony a sly grin as he called out. "That's my sister." Almost too soon we were up on stage and zoning out during speeches, I was day-dreaming about kicking some serious bad guy ass when I noticed Sammi digging her arm into my ribs. It looked like it was time for me to make my valedictory speech. Crap. I made my way over to the lectern catching sight of a beaming Tony in the first row.

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the Class of 2012:

I'm sure you have been told that this is the best time of your life. It may be. But if it's true that this is the best time of your life, then you have my condolences. The truth is, your whole life is ahead of you. The memorable stops in your journey, the best and worst, are hiding in the future.

Whatever you think your dream is now, it will probably change, and that's okay. Just remember this: It doesn't matter that your dream came true if you spent your whole life sleeping. You know that uncertainty you feel today? It never goes away. The question is, do you know how to make uncertainty your friend? How do you know what is the right path to choose to get the result that you desire?

I will hazard a prediction. When you are 80 years old, and in a quiet moment of reflection narrating for only yourself the most personal version of your life story, the telling that will be most compact and meaningful will be the series of choices you have made. In the end, we are our choices.

The problems of failure are hard. The problems of success can be harder because nobody warns you about them. I watched my peers, and my friends, and the ones who were older than me and watched how miserable some of them were. I'd listen to them telling me that they couldn't envisage a world where they did what they had always wanted to do any more because now they had to earn a certain amount every month just to keep where they were. You can't move on until you go. And you can't go if you're afraid to move on.

You have a choice. You can either be a passive victim of circumstance, or you can be the active hero of your own life. Action is the antidote to apathy and cynicism and despair. You will inevitably make mistakes. Learn what you can and move on. At the end of your days, you will be judged by your gallop, not by your stumble. If you're making mistakes, it means you're out there doing something. You are dreaming and you are awake.

It is impossible to live without failing at something unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all — in which case, you fail by default. Failure taught me things about myself that I could have learned no other way. The knowledge that you have emerged wiser and stronger from setbacks means that you are, ever after, secure in your ability to survive. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Your time is limited. So don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma, which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice.

Here's something else that's true. In the day-to-day trenches of adult life, there is actually no such thing as atheism. There is no such thing as not worshipping. Everybody worships. The only choice we get is what to worship. In all you do, worship wisely. Our common humanity is more important than our differences. The way to be happy is to like yourself and the way to like yourself is to do only things that make you proud. Never do anything just for the money. Do whatever you can just for love. One day, you will understand that it is harder to be kind than to be clever.

Never, never, never, never — in nothing, great or small, large or petty — never give in, except to convictions of honour and good sense. You must knock on doors until your knuckles bleed. Doors will slam in your face. You must pick yourself up, dust yourself off and knock again.

Persevere. Nothing worthwhile is easy. No one of achievement has avoided failure — sometimes, catastrophic failures. But they keep at it. They don't quit. Now will saying "yes" get you in trouble at times? Will saying "yes" lead you to doing some foolish things? Yes it will. But don't be afraid to be a fool. Cynics always say "no." But saying "yes" begins things. Saying "yes" is how things grow. Saying "yes" leads to knowledge. So for as long as you have the strength to, say "yes."

I once read about a baseball player who struck out 1,330 times. But we don't remember that Babe Ruth failed 1,330 times. We remember the 714 times Babe Ruth hit a home run. You can't climb the ladder of success with your hands in your pockets .It is our failure to become our perceived ideal that ultimately defines us and makes us unique. It's not easy. But if you accept your misfortune and handle it right, your perceived failure can become a catalyst for profound re-invention. The very least you can do in your life is to figure out what you hope for. The most you can do is live inside that hope, running down its hallways, touching the walls on both sides.

In essence people. Never. Never. Never. Give up. And maybe one day well meet again on the pages of Forbes 500." I grinned, before taking a bow and sitting down after a few more boring speeches we were handed our diplomas. I'll never forget crossing that stage with my best friend. Awkwardly hugging my head of house, receiving my crisp diploma and my graduation candle. Once the last person had been called and the clichéd 'I believe I can Fly' graduation pop song had been played we were shepherded out onto the quadrangle where we mumbled the school chants - the words of which nobody really knows, before throwing our hats in the air. I'd barely taken two steps before Tony crashed into me with a hug.

"My little Valedictorian! Excellent speech!" He hugged me tight. "Mom and Dad would be so proud today."

"Thanks, Tone, I'm glad you could all make it!" I said grinning at the assembled avengers.

"Wouldn't have missed it for the word." Hawkeye grinned grabbing my hand and twirled me into his arms planting a soft kiss on my lips. Beside me Tony coughed, Ally reached over and elbowed him grinning.

"It's her big day, give her some leeway," she turned to me, "congratulations, Jex. I'm proud of you,"

"I know, I can't believe it's over. No more homework, no more assignments and no more cranky teachers."

"Yeah but, time for a day job with an even worse boss." Ally joked causing the rest of the avengers to laugh.

"Well, I don't know about the rest of you but I could really go for some food around now," I said and Tony grinned,

"God I thought you'd never want to leave. Good thing your favourite brother go us a reservation at a swanky restaurant downtown."

"And what restaurant would that be?" I asked as Ally, Tony, Clint and I piled into the Audi. Bruce, Cap, Thor, Loki and Natasha were following behind.

"Wait and see." Tony smirked. It turned out I didn't have to wait long. I rolled my eyes as we pulled up in front of a restaurant a couple of blocks from school.

"Swharma Seriously?"

* * *

**I thought it was about time, Jex graduated from High school don't you? Better late than never! **

**Consverslover, awhh thanks! **

**Booklover, it's coming I promise. **


	3. The fixing of the tap

**Once again as I'm a forgetful slack (add an adjective and/or profanity) **

**I don't own the avengers. **

**Or do I?**

* * *

"Good morning Ms. Stark, it is seven am, a sunny 27 degrees in Malib-"

"Jarvis!" I interrupted, "If you must tell me how hot it is in Malibu, do it quietly." I whispered.

"it is seven am, a sunny 27 degrees in Malibu with swells reaching 10 feet." I moaned as Jarvis switched the windows off my walls.

"Go away Thor, I'm not ready to get up yet," I pulled the covers over my head as I heard a chuckle from the doorway.

"Good morning angel eyes," I jumped and stared at Hawkeye leaning casually against my bedroom door. In a pair of flannelette pyjamas. I blushed as I looked down at my own iron man PJ's.

"Tony bought them for my birthday," I informed him throwing a jumper over my top, suddenly remembering what I meant to say. "What are you doing here?" I asked brushing the sleep out of my eyes

"I find that you," Hawkeye crossed my room and sat down on my bed with a grin. "Are lot more cheerful in the morning's if you have something pleasant to wake up too. And on a morning like this when everybody's hung over, I decided to the world a public service." I grinned as he leant forward and kissed me gently on the lips.

"Good Morning," I smiled as he pulled me close and leant in for another soft kiss, I pulled back hurriedly as I caught sight of myself in the mirror.

"What's wrong?" Hawkeye asked concerned as I leapt out of bed and into my bathroom.

"Morning breath and bed hair!" I called as I slugged back some mouthwash and pulled a brush through my tangled mass of hair.

"You could smell like Thor's bedroom and look like the Hulk gone wrong and you would still be the most gorgeous thing I have ever seen." Hawkeye said walking in behind me and wrapping a loose hand around my waist brushing his lips against the nape of my neck. I smiled softly at him as he spun me around picking me up and sitting me on the counter. I wrapped my arms loosely around his neck brining him closer towards me, and bought his lips up to mine. We moved in sync his hands around my waist gradually moving up and down my back, my fingers played with the soft tips of his hair, our lips mashed together, bodies entwined neither of us sure where we ended and the other began. Hawkeye moved his lips down caressing my neck his finger tips playing loosely with the bottom of my shirt, I let my hands slink down his tightly formed arms and dance across his rigid abdomen. We pulled apart as sharp soft knock echoed through my room.

"Hey Jex, Hawkeye. Stop making out. We can hear you in the kitchen!" Ally's voice penetrated my door. I blushed as Hawkeye helped me off sink and we crossed me room opening the door to reveal a smirking Ally.

"We weren't making out," I protested with a grin. "Hawkeye was helping me… fix my tap." Ally chucked as we walked down the hall together, Hawkeye a few paced in front of us. I laughed as Ally leaned over and whispered in my ear.

"So how far did you guys get?" I smirked and held up seven fingers. Ally grinned mouthing seven with a smirk at Hawkeye she added.

"Someone got lucky." I laughed as he swatted at her. I froze as we entered the kitchen threshold and saw Tony sitting at the kitchen bench a glass of ice water against his head and a packet of panadol beside him, surrounded by the rest of the avengers in various states of dress, nursing several hangovers.

"One question." Tony said to me softly as I sat down beside him quietly. "What happened last night? I mean I've got bit's a pieces but that's it." I grinned.

"Well we started at Swharma, then we headed back here where you had a party already in full swing by the time we got here. Among the guests on the A-list were Hugh Hefner, Breckin Meyer, thanks for that by the way. He gave me a on set pass for Franklin and Bash!" I grinned, "Oh and you challenged Thor, Loki, Dominic Cooper and Robert Downey Jr. to a drinking competition, you beat Cooper, Tied with Robert and lost dismally to Thor and Loki, then you got sulky and tried to drink yourself under the table again. I think Ally put you to bed after you peed the suit. Again." Tony exhaled rubbing his hands against his temples.

"Word to the wise little sister. Never play drinking games with Demi-gods. Liquor hardly touches them." I grinned

"Duly noted big brother," I glanced around at the Avengers all of whom were nursing some sort of hangover, compared to the boys and Ally, Natasha seemed chipper. That was a first. Everyone groaned as the phone started to ring loudly.

"It's Fury," Ally said checking the caller-ID, after picking up and discovering an irate Fury on the other end, I had forced Tony to invest in caller-ID.

"Don't answer it!" Tony groaned, "Hangovers are an acceptable reason not to pick up!" everybody glanced at Cap. If anybody would rule in against the not picking up when the boss calls and you have a hangover rule, it would be our humble and beloved leader, Capsicles, the human popsicle. Surprisingly though it seemed Cap decided to be lenient.

"I accept the rule, hang up Ally." Ally glanced at him with surprise before ending the call. Moments later there was a knock on the door.

"I'll get it," I said noting the sorry sight that surrounded me, "I'm coming!" I yelled at the door before yanking it open, revealing a tall man in a dark suit,

"Let me guess. You work for SHIELD?" I asked with a roll of my eyes, the man gave me a confused look. "Don't worry," I said with a grin. "Our neighbours know where secret agents. They're pretty cool with it." I chuckled at the look on his face.

"I have a package for Jessica Stark." he passed me a thick manila folder before retreating down the steps and into an armoured convoy truck. Yes because that was subtle. I mean c'mon guys, it's not like the dark suits and armoured tank like vehicles don't spell out secret agent! We just had to go adding the logo on the side. Two words. Obvious much? As I contemplated the fallings of our supposed 'secret' agency, I walked back into the kitchen absentmindedly tearing open the folder,

"Watcha got there gorgeous?" Hawkeye asked me curiously.

"I'm not sure," I said as I poked my fingers in pulling out a set of papers and a small USB stick, from across the room Ally cat called,

"Someone's in trouble! What'd you do this time Jex? Broke another one of Fury's guns?" She asked with a grin. The grin soon slipped from her face as she saw mine.

"What is it?" Clint asked concerned,

"I'm not sure," I said incredulously. "Can I borrow someone's phone?"

* * *

**Yay for cliffhanger. God I'm way to tired, I'm running on vapors and it's Thursday, but you should lal be proud of me. I faced one of my fears today, and my best friend who is amazing decided to do it with me. Thanks heaps to Ally! **

**Stellar-Prime. Thanks, I'm glad you like it. **

**Wolf-Rain lover. I'm afraid I can't claim responsibility for the speech. I took the best bits of famous speeches my brothers old captain speeches and some of my own previous speeches and threw them together. **

**Booklover, did you like it? There's more where that came from! **

**Converslover, I'm glad you agree, if I'd waited any longer Jex probably would have been an old woman before I remembered! **

**Musicallover. It Loves you back! **

**Until next time, **

**Remember if you see a kid getting picked on, stand up for them, even if you don't know them. You could save a life. **

**Blaze!**


	4. The Elusive File Folder

**The Elusive File Folder! **

**YAY! Enjoy my lovelies! **

* * *

"I thought you'd be calling Ms Stark," Fury's voice greeted me almost as soon as I'd entered his number and pressed enter call.

"Damn, I'd hate to think I was becoming predictable." I said rolling my eyes, as much as Fury hated to admit it, he wasn't all knowing. I could think of a certain occasion involving an eye patch, a rainbow smiley face sticker and some super glue, that had never been concretely linked back to Loki and I. "A quick question Fury, If I stick this USB in my computer will it self-destruct after I'm finished with it, because if one of my USB ports disintegrates there will be hell to pay. And If anything, I'm under exaggerating."

"Ms Stark, I have it on good authority, that the people who sent you that USB do favour the self destruct method." Fury said causing me to chuckle.

"Okay, I'll just use one of SHIELDS computers then. Thanks Fury!" I clicked off before he could say anything else. The Avengers stared worriedly at me, as I waved cheerfully before heading upstairs to Natasha's room. "Hey Natasha!" I called down the stairs. "I'm borrowing your laptop." I said quietly before asking loudly. "Can I borrow your grenades?"

"Okay!" Nat yelled upstairs. I grinned retrieving her SHIELD issued laptop and dumping it on my bed. This way later when she tried to kill me for destroying her laptop, JARVIS had evidence of me asking permission to borrow it. "Lets see what we have here." I murmured sticking the USB into the port after swiping my hand over Natasha's keyboard. When will people learn, when living in a household full of the world's best hackers. NEVER, EVER leave your laptop unsecured. Because something like this will happen. I blinked as a video file automatically started playing and plugged in some headphones.

"Hi Ms Stark," The ruggedly handsome man on screen smiled at me, "I'm Ethan Hunt. I work for the Impossible Missions Force, or as we call it. IMF, we specialise in missions of the impossible kind.

"You don't say. " I muttered as the man on screen grinned as if he knew exactly what I was thinking.

"We. Need your help." I rolled my eyes, thankyou Captain Obvious. He and Cap should get together some time. They could form their own group. The Captanious Captain squad. It could be Captain America, Captain Obvious and even Fury could join after all, he was a wannabe Pirate. On screen Ethan resumed speaking.

"You have a very impressive file for someone of your age. And we were hoping you could put some of those impressive skills to aiding us." Ethan coughed, "You may choose four members of your team to join you. Providing one is Loki the god of mischief, he is to be acting as your bodyguard for he duration of this mission." "Your mission if you choose to accept it." I rolled my eyes at that. These guys had explosive USB's and my file; obviously I didn't have much of a choice. "Is to help catch and incarcerate this man. I believe you may be familiar with him." Beside Ethan a mug shot of a notorious weapons dealer popped up. One who had previously kidnapped the man who had tried to kill my brother and somehow managed to get off the charges. I think he pleaded insanity. And looking at his photo I could kind of see why he got off.

"Justin Hammer. It's always fun when he's around." I rolled my eyes, however when the man had full control of his brains he could barely manufacture weapons that worked, what was the problem with keeping him locked up now?

"Ordinarily a man like Justin Hammer wouldn't be a problem; however he seems to being aided by a much more able bodied criminal. Another fan of yours I'm told." Ethan smirked as a second photo appeared this one I recognised instantaneously. This charmer had previously had me kidnapped and then delivered me too his boss after I threatened to kill him. I could definitely see why this man hated me. It was my favourite old companion, Jacob.

"I'll have him before dinner." I grinned as Ethan said.

"Ms Stark, you have two days to make up your mind, decide the members of the team before you receive an evaluation of your capabilities on board the SHIELD ship." He grinned. "Oh and if you haven't realised it. This USB will self-destruct in Five seconds. I hope you didn't love that USB port too much." I smirked dropping Natasha's smoking laptop on her before sliding down the banister and into the lounge room where the Avengers waited.

"Well kids," I said with a grin. "Looks like some of us are going on a Field Trip!"

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**FIELD TRIP!**

**MusicalLover, as I do you. Booklover, I'd hate to think I was becoming predictable! Close but no cigar. Wolfrainlover, I will make sure I put more soft side in the story. And now you have to wait to see what's going to happen on the field trip. I'm mean I know!**

**Until next time my pretties, **

**Read and Review! **

**Blaze! **


	5. FIELD TRIP!

**Sorry kiddies, I've been under siege of work from school. The good news is, Holidays are Nigh! I'm getting me some CHOCOLATE!**

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I sighed grabbing my phone off my bedside table clumsily sliding it unlocked.

"I'm sorry Miss Stark is currently unavailable at present, please call back during the office hours of twelve to one." I said about to hang up as a familiar throaty voice echoed down the line.

"Miss Stark."

"What?" I snapped back at Fury, "It's six in the morning Fury, it's common knowledge that my brain doesn't kick in till nine am on weekdays, and on weekends twelve. If there's some bad guys threatening to blow up a building, tell them they're just going to have to wait a couple of hours."

"Miss Stark," Fury interrupted again. "I called to ensure you were on your way."

"On my way where?" I asked curiously, "I'm pretty sure Pirates of the Caribbean auditions were last week?" I sighed, "See even my puns are bad when I have no brain." As expected he ignored me.

"On your way to the airport Miss Stark, I have called a meeting with all of the avengers,"

"Okay, don't get your panties in a bunch, we'll be there, when does the flight leave,"

"It was supposed to leave half an hour ago."

"Oh," I said, "See this is why you tell Pepper and Loki things, they're textbook at getting me out of bed and on a plane. Pepper pushes me out, and Loki just uses his magic to put cockroaches and rats in there. He'd started doing it ever since he found out that they terrified me. Anyway," I rubbed my eyes sleepily. " We'll be there in an hour." I said with a grin. "Bye Fury!" I laughed as he hung up without another word. I tiredly pulled myself out of bed and knocked on each of the avengers bedroom doors in turn.

"Who died?" Tony asked after the avengers had all piled out of the hall, each in various states of dress and sleep.

"No-one, it's worse. We have a plan to catch." Everyone blinked at me, so I elaborated. "Fury's called a meeting."

"Oh Crap."

Almost an hour later we were all sleepily packed onto a plane which flew to the super secret I'd die if I told you SHIELD helicarrier, which was currently flying above the 'there's a sniper rifle pointing at me for just thinking about telling you' Co-ordinates. *cough* (51, 52).

"Jess!" Cap bought my attention to him,

"Yes Capsicles, oh beloved leader of mine, what can I do you for?" I asked as we all began to gather our stuff after the pilot had warned us of our approaching landing.

"When we arrive no running off and hiding around the SHIELD ship. That goes double for you as well Loki. Your both lucky to be invited back after the stunt you two pulled last time."

"Yes sir!" I saluted him with a grin, struggling not to laugh as behind Steve, Loki swivelled his hips in a movement reminiscent of out last trip to the helicarrier. Steve shook his head and thankfully turned away as I doubled up silent laughter pouring from my lips. I grinned straightening up with my bag in my hand tears running down my eyes. Loki grinned walking beside me as we followed Cap into the hanger getting disbelieving stairs from the avengers as we kept up our own angelic smiles.

"You know something," I said to Loki as we filed into the meeting room flopping down into the leather chairs that were seated around the boardroom table. "This is the first meeting on the helicarrier I've actually turned up too on time!"

"Why am I not surprised?" Loki said with a grin as Ally sat down beside me.

"What are you packing?" She whispered covertly, it was common knowledge I always had some form of entertainment on me. In my defence you never knew exactly when you were going to be put in detention.

"All I've got on me are Playing Cards." I shrugged. "We could play Uka? Or Drinking games?" I suggested.

"Let's go with Uka." Ally said with a grin. "Somehow I don't think drinking games would be appropriate."

"Depends." I laughed, "Are we still on probation?" Ally nodded. "We'll that's our answer."

"Avengers!" Fury said gesturing into the meeting as I passed Ally, Tony, and Bruce some cards. Cap refused to play, and Thor wouldn't get it. Loki however was card keeper "I've gathered you all here for a meeting," Fury continued, as our heated card game began we ignored him and Focused on stealthily passing the cards we wanted to play around the table to Loki. "We've had reports of alleged kidnaping that is to be handed out upon a Miss Jasmine Santiago." That caught my attention. I briefly flicked my gaze up to the screen to see a familiar picture of a stick thin model type girl who looked bratty and annoying. Which I could personally attest that she was.

"Why not let the criminals take her, we'd be doing the world a huge favour. The government would owe us forever." Everybody stared at me curiously, I took advantage of their distraction to pass a card to Loki. "What, she's annoying, and bratty and has a stick so far up her ars-" I broke off as I saw Cap's face. "I'm not exactly her biggest fan." Ally smirked, passing a card around.

"If this is what you think of her, I'd hate to know what she thinks of you."

"Miss Santiago's father is on the board of directors for caltex. One of the worlds most popular petroleum providers." He glared at me, "So no Miss Stark we can't just let her get kidnapped. That's why I'm placing her under yours and Agent McLennan's twenty four hour surveillance." I scowled at him as we all passed another card under the table.

"Wait but what about that super secret USB thing that the IMF sent me?" I asked. "If I do that, then do I get out of this?"

"No!" Fury said with a scowl. "I've already had permission granted for you to bring Miss Santiago along." I pulled a face sliding my second last card to Loki. Before realising what that meant.

"Uka'd!" I yelled fist pumping the air and using my last card to seal the game. "I win! In your faces!" I said and began my victory dance before remembering where we were. Fury scowled at me as I sat back down and everybody threw the cards at Loki, who buried the pack somewhere in his robes. I don't think I'll be wanting that pack back.

"Meeting dismissed," Fury said giving us a disgusted look before walking out, I rolled my eyes turning to Cap,

"Yeah we know," I cut him off as he opened his mouth. "Grounded. C'mon," I grabbed Ally and Loki's hands and towed them out of the meeting room down the hall and into mine. I slammed my door shut keeping my attention focused on the curious faces of my partners in crime.

"I need your help with some revenge," I said with a grin. "Revenge on Fury."

* * *

**Did you like that cliffhanger? Did ya? If Ya did, hit me up! **

**wolfrainlover! Yay! we've been missing Fury. **

**converslover! Thankyou! what did you think of this?**

**booklover! HAHAHAHAHAH I can't wait to hear from you again!**

**Read and Review people. **

**Happy Easter. **

**Blaze!**


	6. It wasn't us!

Previously on avengers sequel sequel.

I slammed my door shut keeping my attention focused on the curious faces of my partners in crime.

"I need your help with some revenge," I said with a grin. "Revenge on Fury."

* * *

"Excellent." Loki said with a grin, I didn't even have to look at him to know he was in. "I have a score to settle with him."

"Awesome." I grinned at him before turning to my usual partner in crime. Ally raised an eyebrow.

"Jex refresh my memory, how many more suspensions and probation's do we have until we're fired." I grinned rubbing my chin in thought.

"If I'm correct and I always am, we have one more probation before a suspension and lucky us two suspensions before termination!" Ally laughed,

"We'll in that case I'm all for it!"

"That's my girl. Now here's what we have to do!"

"What did you do?" Steve asked me accusingly as I hoped up on the desk of a random SHIELD agent.

"Nothing," I replied nonchalantly cleaning my nails. Cap just raised his eyebrows

"It wasn't me officer I swear it." I said throwing my hands in the air pretending to crack getting a laugh from the surrounding SHIELD agents.

"Jess, Jess, Jess what am I going to do with you," Steve sighed at me.

"Give me some candy," I replied hopefully batting my eyelashes. Cap's reply was cut off as a dangerous looking Fury entered the command room.

"Ms Stark." He said glaring at me.

"Whatever happened it wasn't me." I said throwing up my hands. "I've been here the whole time."

"Then pray tell who substituted confetti cannons for each of the guns in the training room."

"I have no idea," I said innocently, "But I'm guessing it was the same person who put trip wires on each of the stair cases." I grinned as I heard tell tale thuds and gasps of pain echoing through the ship.

"Sir," we all glanced at Agent Hill who was leant over another agent's computer. "We're receiving calls from the united states military, CIA, FBI and several other government agencies wanting to know why there is a large picture advertising our organisation on our current co-ordinates. "

"Someone bring up the projective cameras." I smirked as a picture of Fury appeared with the caption. 'Are you an idiot with no future? Well then were looking for you! Join SHIELD Today!' There was a number down the bottom which looked suspiciously like that of the suicide hotline.

"Know anything about this Ms Stark?" I shook my head.

"Not a clue,"

"Someone get maintenance up there to fix this." He glared at me before stalking out I shrugged, as Cap shook his head at me.

"Why does no-one believe me?" I asked the SHIELD agent beside me incredulously. "I mean come on where's the trust?" I laughed as the agent stared at me like, WTF? A few moments later Fury was back covered in whip cream a bruise flourishing on his face, a smirking Ally walking behind him some very thin wire tossed over her shoulder and some meringue covering her uniform.

"Explain." Fury glared.

"How about no!" I said cheerfully. "I've been here the entire time so you have no evidence I was even involved. As for Ally, just because she has the wire doesn't mean she did it, plus you're covered in cream not meringue so clearly it wasn't her." Ally chuckled walking over to me and kicking the agent out of his chair so she could sit down.

"So tell me Ally, what were you actually doing with meringue and wire?" I asked loudly,

"I was making a lemon meringue pie with Marzipan avenger's figures! I needed the wire to help the figures look realistic!" Ally replied back equally as loud. Fury however glared at us both before turning on his heel and stalking out. We were discussing the best way to remove the stains from her shirt when Fury returned dragging Loki with him.

"Hey Lo-Lo," I grinned, Loki rolled his eyes at me before disappearing, Ally made a cough that sounded a lot like 'decoy'. Fury snapped around at us,

"If you two know anything about what is going on, you will tell me." He said staring us down, there was a brief click of a lock sliding into place, which I knew was my cue. I then hit a button on my phone and a loop; of the rainbow song started playing over the speakers. "Disable it Jessica." Fury yelled at me after Ally and I had been pulled of the desk and dragged to the front of the room.

"I would if I could but I can't," I giggled at the look on his face.

"What do you mean it can't be disabled?" Fury asked clearly exasperated and you would be too if you had to listen too pink is the sun rising and so is a rose… for an hour straight. I shrugged innocently. "You banned me from touching your computer." Cap raised an eyebrow at us as several people's computers flashed red; an alarm sounded as the sprinklers set into motion. "It wasn't us."

* * *

**I hoped you guys enjoyed this chapter,** **sorry about the late update. I've been camping without WiFi! the good news is I'm back ion the grid so it's business as usual! Also, Happy Easter! **

**Musical lover, thankyou, I'm glad you did. converslover. Agreed. it was just ****_so _****something he would do. I had to add it in! booklover, unfortunetly I have a feeling your right. Not even Blaze can take on a furious fury! (see what I did there! xD) wolfsrainlover! what can I say, you cant keep that amount of awesomeness bottled up! xD**

**As Always, **

**Read AND Review. **

**Blaze!**


	7. Trouble with a Capital T!

"Ms Stark, Agent McLennan! Loki!" Fury looked as if he was about to explode. Ally and I smirked sitting together on the SHIELD agents desk, I had my legs tightly crossed beneath me, as Ally let her swing off the side. Loki stood tall leaning against the edge off the desk beside me. They'd finally discovered him hiding in the main breaker room playing God, turning off peoples lights to scare them.

"This outa be good." Ally whispered to me. I chuckled before replying.

"I finally think we cracked him!" Our achievement however, was short lived as our attention was grabbed by the doors to the command room being thrown open so hard the hit the walls with a resounding bang, as Ethan Hunt strutted into the room a few agents at his back.

"Director Fury, my apologies. But I would like to borrow this lovely young lady here," he pointed at me. "Could we please have the room." Fury shot me a glare before stalking out. Ethan looked pointedly at Ally and Loki, but I placed my hands on their shoulders.

"They're with me. They're part of my team!" Ethan shrugged,

"So I take it your accepting?" now it was my turn to shrug.

"It doesn't seem like I have much of as choice, but I have a few questions, some for in front of my friends and some without."

"Okay shoot."

"First, I'm going to need guaranteed time off from the mission, as are my crew, it's for a wedding. And the reason we need time off is because my team are the bride, groom, the best woman of honour, and a groomsmen. That and for the past few months, I've been tortured bridal style by Bridzilla over here, and let it just be said, I'm probably better trained to take over the world Hitler style with an army of caterer's, florists and irate brides at my back." Ethan snorted as Ally glared at me. "The other bit of time off I'm going to need is time off for a hen's party." I grinned devilishly for Ally as she bit her lip. Trust me if you ever wanted a bride to do what you wanted. Just bring up the hens night your planning. Best Blackmail EVER. Ethan thought for a moment before nodding.

"Sure, so long as I get to come!" he joked and I smirked.

"Do you strip because if you do, you can certainly come," Ally gulped as I laughed,

"Okay second question, Why me?" Ally coughed and I rolled my eyes before amending my statement. "Why Us?" Ally grinned saying.

"Thankyou,"

"Anytime my dear," I replied with a grin.

"Well Ms Stark, as you've been told." Ethan looked amused at Ally and I's exchange. "Your record is exceptional. That and the criminals are after you, so it makes more sense to have you with us, rather than to lock you up in a safe house somewhere remote and watch you eventually escape." I smirked,

"You should like you've done that before, Mr Hunt." Now it was Ethan's turn to smirk.

"Once or twice, they really need to update your security. Any more questions Ms Stark,"

"Yeah, Just one! Jasmine Santiago, does she really have to come? Or can we just drop her off a random cliff somewhere?" beside me Ally laughed as Ethan just smirked.

"Ah yes, I've heard about our mysterious tagalong. Unfortunately, it appears that your boss knows my boss, so I'm under orders to take her along."

"But you're a spy!" I exploded. "Spy's should have blackmail on EVERYONE, especially their boss! Have you not seen James Bond!" Ally and Loki both chuckled and I could have sworn I detected an eye-roll from Ethan.

"You can't believe everything you see in the movies Ms Stark." He grinned "Anything else?"

"Yeah," I sighed. "When do we pick her up?"

* * *

**I'm back at school. And back to writing. So in short I'm all yours. **

**Converslover. There will always be more Clint. I've just actually got to get in the plot. Hold on it'll be worth it at the end. Promise. **

**Booklover. Hahahah Of course. I'll update for you! **

**Read and Review! **


	8. Bridezilla With a capital B

**I'm a horrible lazy author I know, but I'm updating at least. **

* * *

"Venue." Ally shot at me. We were currently sitting in my office at Stark industries. After finding the 'present' we had left in Fury's bed, he had unceremoniously kicked Ally, Loki and I back home, which was fine with us. Especially Ally, who upon our return had re-wallpapered my office with pictures of her dream day.

"St Patricks Cathedral!" I said pointing at the corresponding picture. Ally had been grilling me all morning as we picked out save -a-dates, place cards, reception venues, bands, flower arrangements and table settings, until we had eventually assembled a collage of Ally's perfect wedding on my back wall.

"Looks like there's only one thing missing!" Ally said sighing wistfully as she glanced at the vacant spot on our collage. "The dress." I smirked grabbing her hand.

"Come with me."

"What? Why?" Ally asked bewildered. "Where are we going?"

"You'll see." I grinned dragging her out of my office, down the hall to the formal conference room. Ally raised her eyebrows as I pushed into one of the hard backed leather chairs.

"Alyssa McLennan, as my first wedding gift to you. I present your dream wedding dress as designed by Vera Wang and modelled by Alex Vega, from sales." Moments later the door opened and in walked Alex . The dress she was wearing was spectacular. It was strapless dress that had a beautiful creamy coloured lace decorating the top with large pearls trailing the upper portion of the dress. It was then drawn in at the waist by a thick, brown ribbon, followed by white silk cascading down in layers to the floor. The overall look was completed with a beautiful necklace which had diamonds trailing the way down Alex's neck. The shoes were softly coloured white stiletto's that were designed to look the part, but not send the bride tumbling down the aisle. "And for the encore, Four stunning bridesmaids dresses, once again designed by Vera herself, and modelled by the elegant Linda Garcia." Ally gasped as Linda entered dressed in a pale red number that clung to her shape before plunging out to the floor in a separate layers, each being a varying lighter shade of red mixed with a tinge of magenta, which I knew was Ally's favourite colour. The look was completed with a thin gold chain, at the end of which hung an elegantly carved ruby pendant, The shoes where a pair of blood red heels, designed for practicality whilst still retaining an elegant edge. And with red and gold ribbons falling from their hair.

"Jex. You are amazing!" Ally leapt up and pulled me into a bone crushing hug.

"I know. And I promise, whatever stuffy boring, idiot you choose to be your maid of honour, I won't try to sabotage them in any way and take their place. " Ally grinned cutting me off.

"Jex I thought you already knew. The stuffy, boring, pretentious idiot, your words not mine." She smirked. "That I've chosen to be my maid of honour is you!" Who better to be my maid of honour than my best friend and future sister!" I smirked.

"You know you haven't actually asked me to be your maid of honour, for all you know I could have a prior engagement!" Ally rolled her eyes.

"A prior engagement more important than you only brothers wedding?"

"Perhaps." I smirked as she cleared her throat.

"Jessica 'Jex' Leanne Stark, beloved future sister of mine, will you do me the immense favour of being my maid of honour?"

"I'd be honoured," I laughed giving her a hug. "Now I can finally get down to planning the good stuff!" Ally eyed me curiously as she gathered up her wedding dress, now cloaked in a loose garment bag.  
"What's that?" I laughed zipping up the garment bag that contained the dress.

"Your hen's party!"

* * *

**Thanks too, booklover, YAY! She will appear soon. I promise. Also I had a reader name the Jex and Clint fandom, they called it Starton. Stark+Barton. what do you think, should I run with it? **

**Converslover, I know I find that sometimes the plot is essential to the storyline. **

**CCGG, Sup. Jasmine plays a minor to medium role in the story, And thankyou for your reviews. I loved them. Nice cheese!**

**UNTIL NEXT TIME, **

**Read AND review. **

**Blaze!**


	9. Doomsday Preppers

**Hey guys. Sorry for the late update. I've been really sick. I still I am. But things are happening in my world and I needed Jex to help center my gravity. **

* * *

"You know you really will sleep through anything," I groggily awoke to a grinning Clint sitting on then end of my bed holding casually in his hands a rather large and ominously empty Nerf gun.

"You had better not have shot me with that whilst I was asleep." I sleepily glared at him. Clint laughed at my expression as Tony laughed from my doorway cradling an If it was even possible an even larger Nerf Gun.

"He did. But only because I wanted to wait so I could hear your screams of pain!" He said pressing the trigger and unleashing a hailstorm of bullets small plastic tipped bullets upon me.

"Oww! Tony ! Quit It!" I yelled diving under the protection of my doona as the first round of small red welts appeared on my skin. After the rain of bullets finally ended I cautiously surfaced snatching up my pillow and holding it in front of my face to use as a shield. "What was that for?" I demanded incredulously throwing down my shield, after they showed no more signs of fire.

"We heard you putting together a team and didn't invite us!" Tony pouted at me softly.

"Boyfriend trumps evil guy, who might I remind you. Kidnapped you not very long ago!" Clint said looking hurt. I rolled my eyes at the both of them sighing exasperatedly.

"You're both idiots. You know you're invited!" I said shaking my head. "I didn't have to invite Ally she just assumed she was going, just like you two should have. Like hell I'm going to go on a dangerous certain to fail mission without the right back up." Clint grinned,

"That's my girl; now tell me what exactly have we signed up for?"

"You mean to tell me, that you two signed up for a possibly death defying mission, where death is pretty much a certainty, without knowing what the hell you were fighting for?" I face palmed as they both hung their heads sheepishly. "Like I said, Idiots. The pair of you!"

"Great, what are you doing here?" I asked Ethan. I'd just finished filling Tony and Clint on the details of mission before Cap had called us down for lunch. "Oh No," I said my chest sinking as Ethan gave me a smirk.

"It's time."

"No! Have Mercy!" I cried throwing my hands in the air. When Ethan's smirk just grew I relented. "At least let a sister eat first!" Half an hour later, I could stall no more. That and Loki dragged me down stairs to the garage. Literally. My only consolation was that the five of us were piled into the leather seats of the Audi, because let's face it, when picking up a brat even more spoilt that Satan, you may as well do it in style. We'd been on the road tailing Ethan for half an hour when Ally turned to me.

"So Jex, spill it. Why do you hate this Jasmine chick so much you would endanger your SHIELD career just to get revenge on our boss for sticking you with her as an assignment?"

"Okay for starters," I grinned. "You and I both know that if my SHIELD career isn't in danger at least once a week, then I'm not having a good week!" Beside me Clint chuckled. "But the real reason I hate her is that she's a stuck-up, self-absorbed, pop-loving idiot whose favourite pet is the Shetland pony 'daddy' bought her for her birthday. In short, she's annoying, boring, perky and a bitch.

"So just those few reasons?" Tony chuckled from the front seat. I rolled my eyes affectionately.

"Yeah, something like that." I groaned sliding down in my seat as we entered the driveway. Rolling up the many hills of sculpted gravel until a large sprawling white mansion appeared. "I'm going to kill myself." I mumbled as Clint dragged me out of the car gently.

"No you're not." He whispered in my ear. "Because you know I would miss you terribly!" I smiled up at him as Ally came to stand beside me. Everyone visibly held their breath as a tall slim brunette in a set of tight fitting designer jeans and tube-top slunk out of the mansion. Jasmine Santiago took one look at us before snorting unimpressed and flatly asking.

"Is this it?"

* * *

**Kudos to booklover and ccgg, booklover, there will always be more Clint and Jex. and ccgg. And your right. There is never a moment when Jex isnt up to pure evil!**

**Until next time. **

**Read and and Review. **

**Jex**


	10. Vegas Baby!

"Okay now I see why you hate her," Ally leant over and whispered in my ear.

"Thankyou! At least someone see's what I have to put up with!" I whispered back as Jasmine turned on her heel and stalked into her house.

"Do we follow her?" I asked half-heartedly already knowing the answer. "Of course we do, c'mon. Let's get this over with." I said pushing my way through the elaborately carved, heavy oak doors and into the thickly carpeted hallway. "So what now?" I asked with a smirk, "Do we whip out our brat-o-meters?" Ethan chuckled and started down the hallway.

"Something like that," he said an paused in front of a panelled door a few feet down the hallway.

"Wait!" Ally said looking mistrustfully between Ethan and the door. "How do you know they're in there?" Now it was Ethan's turn to raise an eyebrow.

"You dare question my awesomeness?" As Loki snorted with laughter, I decided to intervene before she murdered one of them, or both.

"You both make valid points. However in answer to your question Ally," I paused with a smirk. "There's only one way to find out!" Before anyone could stop me, I'd slammed the door open with a bang and barrelled rolled into the room, which was decked out like the rich man's guide to studies. Huddled in the corner staring at us bewildered was Jasmine and an elderly man I could only assume was her father, he had that 'I'm terrified of you but trying not to show it because your my daughter' look. I gave them a cheery wave as the avengers and Ethan filed in behind me. "Kudos Ethan., you were right!" Ethan gave me a grin.

"You sound surprised Ms Stark?" Our banter must have broken the tension because Jasmine turned to her father and started to yell.

"Daddy, you said you were getting the very best in the world to protect me, Not two washed up avengers, a couple of losers and a dork I used to go to school with." Ethan, Clint and surprisingly Loki where the only ones who retained their sanity enough to restrain Ally, Tony and I as we leapt at her. Ally stared dangerously as she lowered her voice from inside Clint's iron grip and said.

"Honey, I could break you like a toothpick." She paused for a moment before smiling maliciously and adding menacingly. "With my pinkie!" As Jasmine visibly paled Loki and I snorted with laughter.

"Nice speech," I complimented her, "Did you think of that on your way over?"

"Yeah actually, it felt rushed, did I rush it? I feel like I rushed it." She said as I tilted my head in thought.

"No I liked it," I said with a grin. "It had a good strong delivery, you know they say a quick threat's a good threat-" I broke off as I realised everyone was staring at us. "What?" I asked incredulously, "can't two women discuss how to best threaten someone in polite company?"

"What is society coming to?" Ally asked me,

"I know right, it's things like this that make me loose my faith in humanity," I rolled my eyes as everybody continued staring. "Continue."

"Well princess," Jasmine's father began hesitantly. "I promised you I would only buy the best to protect you, and I certainly paid for the best so…" He broke off looking warily at us. "These must be the best."

"Don't worry Miss Santiago, I can assure you that we are indeed the very best." Ethan turned on his charm as I coughed drawing everyone's attention to me, the way it should be!

"Let it be said for the record. We have four Avengers, One previously evil Norse God and an IMF agent here today. Now." I turned to Jasmine. "Go get your stuff, we leave in Five. Regardless if wether on not your packed."

"Jex." Ally said reprovingly as she gently placed a hand on my shoulder.

"What?" I protested, "it's not like their paying me to be nice to her." I paused. "Come to think of it, their not paying me at all. That's slave labour people! I'm calling my attorney!" From across the room Clint rolled his eyes affectionately at me.

"It would be, if your were still a child Jex."

"Does being a child in spirit count?" Clint chuckled as I turned to Ethan.

"So where are we heading now?" As Ethan checked his phone I dropped down to my knees and turned my head to the sky.

"C'mon bad guys do a girl a solid and be in Vegas!" I crossed my fingers as Ethan grinned at me.

"Looks like were heading to Vegas!"

"Yeah! Vegas Baby!" I grinned

* * *

**Hey Booklover. I promise I will add more sweet Clint Jex moments for you! Just wait until the end. You will die from cuteness overload! **

**Till next time. **

**Read and Review.!**


	11. Make it stop Make it stop!

"And then daddy bought me Oscar the pony, or was it Gilligan the ostrich? Maybe it was Jamaica, he bought me that year?" We had only been in the car of half an hour before Ally made the fatal mistake of asking Jasmine to tell us about herself. An hour and a half later, we were only up to the eighth round of 'what wrong thing daddy bought me for my birthday this year'

"Make it stop. Make it stop!" I told Ally hunched down in my seat in Ethan's car. It had been decided by Tony that for Jasmine's protection she should be in the car with Ally and I, Loki was with us for my protection. All I could say was that Tony was going to need a protector when Ally and I got near him! Ethan was with us to stop me from lunging at Jasmine. The second he saw me start to reach towards her he'd slam on the brakes locking up my seat belt, holding me back and damn near strangling me. So far he'd only had to do it, twice. "Oh thank god." I cried as my phone started to vibrate, I immediately answered without bothering to check caller-ID. Even Fury was better than Jasmine giving me another lecture on the best way to dye her ponies' mane pink.

"Yo," I answered the phone.

"Do you ever answer the phone correctly?" Steve's voice echoed down the line,

"If by correctly you mean hello, the answer to that is, Rarely." I said with a grin. "What can I do you for Capsicles?"

"Well for starters you can explain to me why there is a industrial size box of strawberry jam, in the kitchen." I smirked.

"That's easy. We ran out of jam."

"We ran out of jam?" Cap said, disbelief colouring his tone.

"Yep. And this way, Bruce can have a jar without me ripping his head off. " From the front seat Loki chuckled, as we all remembered the time I had gone all out ninja style on Bruce because he'd eaten the last of my jam. "Just one jar. And tell him I'll know if he has more. I counted!"

"You counted? Wait why am I not surprised."

"Counting Jam is a normal pastime. I checked. Google told me so it must be true. Besides, it's really good jam!"

"Jex." Cap began in a parental voice.

"Wait. I know that tone, No Bruce can not have more than one jar of my jam!"

"Jex. There's an entire box. There must be at least one-hundred jars."

"Fine," I relented. "He can have two jars. Not a drop more."

"Jex."

"If he really needs that much jam, he can go buy another jar. I swear if he hulks out and breaks my jam from a sugar-high. I will kill him. Bridezilla here will be put to shame if when I get home there is even one jar missing!"

"Are we seriously having an argument about jam?" Cap asked mildly.

"Yep." I said with a grin. "I'm assuming you called to talk to me about something more than my 116 jars of jam." I chuckled. "Told you I counted." I could just imagine Cap shaking his head.

"Yes. Natasha wanted me to ask you about her laptop, she found it smoking on her bed?"

"I had absolutely nothing to do with that!" From his position in the front seat Ethan smirked at me. "But someone told me that Fury would cover the cost of a new laptop. " I said with a grin. "Now Cap I've gotta go, were pulling into Napa Valley!" I said ending the call.

"Napa Valley?" Ally asked me curiously.

"Yeah. If I told him we were going to Vegas he would have said and I quote," I pulled a face and began imitating Cap. "Now Jex, No using fake ID's to under-age gamble. Then when I got home I would have gotten into trouble for doing it anyway. This way I only get into to trouble for not using my better judgment."

"You have netter judgement?" Ethan asked smirking.

"I do indeed." I replied with a grin. "And it's telling me that you should hurry up and get me to Vegas so I can make me some illegal under age gambling money!"

**Hey Brittany, thanks I'm glad you like her! Booklover. It's totally sad, you should seek help! (JOKES). It's awesome you love my story. I've never had a hard core reader like you! Your the best!**

**Until next time, **

**Read and Review. **

**Blaze **


	12. He's after me lucky charms!

**I figured that with finals and everything, you all might be getting your marks back. So in light of the finals season, I figured you could use a little hope, a little humor, and... A little Jex!**

* * *

"Can you smell that?" I asked leaning out the window sticking my face in the air.

"Smell what?" Ally asked unwinding her window.

"That smell in the air, it's like." I paused for a moment. "Booze, Stale drugs and Hookers." Ally and I grinned at each other before yelling, "VEGAS!" We both leant out of our windows gawking like tourists as we took in the flashing lights of the strip. There were things everywhere, an air-balloon with the words Paris on it, the statue of liberty. "Oh my god," I breathed as waterfall's almost as tall as the building exploded around in multi-coloured bursts. "I've died and gone to heaven." I said as Ethan grinned pulling into the winding drive of the Montecito.

"Now this is style," Ally grinned as valets rushed over and opened our doors.

"Ms Stark," A young woman in a tight suit stepped towards me. "I'm Samantha Marquez, Your brother's assistant called ahead; I took the liberty of booking yourself and your friends into our best suite."

"Awesome," I said grabbing the keys from her as we walked into the shimmering floor of the casino where the words 'anything can happen' were draped across the ceiling on an embossed banner.

"Your friends, went on ahead upstairs, they said they would wait for you in your suite."

"Wait. My friends? Tony and Clint?"

"No, they said they knew Mr Hunt. One of your party?"

"Oh right, friends of Ethan's." I glanced at him and he nodded. "Cool. If we need anything we'll let you know, just do me a favour and ring when Tony gets here." I told Samantha as we all trekked over to the elevator.

"Ms Stark, he's already here, he requested three separate suites, one for himself and a Ms McLennan and another one for yourself, a Mr Hunt, a Ms Santiago and a Mr Deer-head, and a third suite for a Mr Barton." Loki scowled as the rest of us smirked.

"Thank you!" I said as we all piled into the one elevator. "So Ethan, who are these friends?"

"It's not in my nature to be mysterious, but I can't talk about it and I can't talk about why. All I can say is you'll find out soon enough," he said ominously. I rolled my eyes as the elevator dinged letting us out on the top floor.

"Ohh mysterious," I said sticking the key in the door, letting it slide open. "Oh my god!" I said running into the suite. "This is amazing! I love Pepper! Bags this room!" I said running into the room that naturally had the best view and the best bed cackling maniacally.

"Hey Jex!" Ethan called from the living room.

"Yo!" I called walking out after throwing my suitcase on the bed.

"You wanted to meet my friends?"

"Yeah," I said pulling my hair back in a ponytail. "Are we going to meet them now?"

"Yeah," Ethan chuckled as I walked into the room and did a double take, "They're already here,"

"And I couldn't have been informed of that before I ran in and started acting like a psyco?" I asked casually as walked over with a grin. "Hi, I'm Jex Stark. And believe it or not I am 100 precent mentally stable. Or at least I was when they tested me last week!"

"Luther Stickle." The large man who sitting next to Ethan extended a hand, "I'm the IT technician."

"So you the hacker?" I asked with a grin. "Wait. I thought I was recruited for my special skill set?"

"I'm the best hacker on the west coast. I performed the IMF database hack back in 1996,"

"I hacked the SHIELD database at age sixteen!" I grinned.

"What's SHIELD?" Luther asked curiously.

"Exactly!" was my reply.

"I'm Declan Gormley," The darkhaired Irishman said from his position on the couch. "I'm the getaway driver and a field agent!"

"You're Irish!" I said with a grin. "Now before I check whether or not you're after me lucky charms, if so there's a box in the pantry." I winked, "I need to know if you've got the swagger. The Irish are famous for three things. The twinkle, in their eye, their love for lucky charms and their swagger." I grinned before thinking. "Wait. I'm mistaken there's four things. The other one's their all alcoholics. But don't worry; I won't test that one till later!"

"Don't worry Ms Stark, I can't say I'm after your lucky charms. It would be unprofessional." I grinned discretely pulling my bucket list up on my phone and ticking off 'make an Irishman say I'm after your lucky charms.' "As for the swagger, what can I say it's a gift." He said and did a quick lap around the room. "As for the drinking people under the table, you look to young to drink." I smirked,

"That's where fake ID's come in handy my friend. Now If you excuse me, I have a bride to be to steal. I smirked at them before crossing the room and letting myself out.

* * *

**Have you missed. Me, of course you have! I got so many reviews on the last chapter! It was awesome. **

**Converslover, awh thanks! Thanks for reviewing too. Booklover, what can I say... Jex ****_really _****likes her Jam, wolfsrainlover, Hopefully order some more Jam. Dr. Bad. Ass, I love your name by the way, Thanks! I appreciate the recommendation! I aim to please. **

**Until next time!**

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**Blaze out!**


	13. Knitting Club!

"Hello Gorgeous," I said as my phone blared with The Story, the ringtone I'd chose for Clint.

"Hello Angel Eyes," Was his reply. "I have a question for you," I grinned in anticipation. "What are you doing tonight?"

"Ally and I are going to knit together,"

"Knit?" He asked amused,

"Yep. Knit. And no you dirty boy, that's not innuendo for anything! We're going celibate!"

"That's not fair. How am I supposed to get in your pants when your celibate?"

"Clint Barton that is a very inappropriate thing to say to your girlfriend!" I smirked as I walked through the hallway.

"I'll tell you what's inappropriate! Promising sexual favours to your boyfriend in-order to get him to come on a death defying mission with you," Clint chuckled.

"Oh really, refresh my memory when did I do that?" I asked.

"When you asked me to come on the mission. In my mind." He admitted as I laughed,

"Nice try. I'll tell you what. Whatever you had planned for tonight. I'll take a raincheck. How's tomorrow sound?"

"Good. It's a date!" He laughed, "I love you,"

"I love you to!" I grinned slipping my phone in my pocket as I stood in front of Tony and Ally's door and rapped loudly on it with my knuckled. "Give her up Tony! I'm kidnapping Ally for tonight. She's all mine! And make her dress slutty!" I called a few minuted later Ally dressed in a short tight silver number was deposited outside the front of the door by a grumbling Tony.

"Yeah, Yeah, ravish her later. We're going to miss our knitting club!" I said and pulled her down the hall and into the lobby of the Montecito.

"Knitting club?" Ally asked with a raised eyebrow. "And why am I the only one who has to dress slutty."

"Excuse me, I'm dressed slutty enough." I said looking down at my tight knee length red dress.

"No way, compared to me you're the virgin Mary!" Ally said reaching over and ripping the bottom of my dress so it barely covered my thighs. My cleavage however, she was satisfied with. "Much better," I rolled my eyes.

"You do realise you owe me six-hundred dollars for this dress right?" We were interrupted as a dark haired security guard made his way over,

"Ladies, I'm going to have to ask you from ripping off each other's clothes in the middle the lobby, however the two of you are most welcome to come back to my office and do it there."

"Thanks but no thanks, but what you can do for me is point us in the direction of the limo rank."

"Limo rank?" Ally asked as we walked through the Montecito and jumped into a shiny black stretch hummer limo. "Oh my god!" She breathed crammed inside the limo, where Ally's best friends from SHIELD training Zoe Little, Maddie Moore and Bella Shea. Pouting in the corner where also Natasha and Jasmine. Surprisingly Natasha was only scowling because she had to stay sober, I mean someone had to make sure Jasmine didn't get kidnapped.

"You seriously didn't think we were going to knitting club dressed like this did you?" I snorted.

"That's what you told her knitting club?" Zoe laughed, "Translation World's best hen's party!"

"Thrown by the world's best maid of honour! Now driver, where is the liquor! I need a big fat drink!"

"Wait Jex!" Ally said from her position beside me. "Tony will kill me if I get you drunk,"

"Pssh," I said grabbing a bottle of Midori and a couple of shot glasses. "He doesn't have to know." I grinned pouring hearty portions into each of the glasses. "Now to the night that none of us will ever remember, or forget!" We raised our shot glasses.

"To getting roaring drunk. Let's party like we're Irish!" Maddie grinned grabbing a couple of bottle of Bacardi breezers and passing them round.

"To the Irish!" We all echoed as I poured another round of shots. "Hey Driver," I called through the screen over Pitbull's All night long.

"Take us to the green room so we can get plastered with a couple of strippers!"

"Yes Ms Stark," The driver called back to me with a grin.

"Oh and Happy!" I called as Bella snatched up a bottle of Vodka schnapps and passed it to Ally to scull. "Not a word of this to Tony."

**CCGG- LOL! The Irish is my favorite too! and Lucy charms are amazing! and I'll try not to make your page bursts, however beware the next chapter it's chock full of gorgeously gorgeous men! Booklover- Hahaha You just wait the big big suprise is comming sooonish! wolfsrainlover- awh thanks! This book love you too! and . XD I love your name! thanks! **

**Also. Happy Birthday to my bestie Ally she's a whole 16 today! she probably won't see this but HAPPY BIRTHDAY BUDDY HAVE A GREAT DAY! **

**Until Next time, **

**Read and Review!**


	14. Busted!

"I am going to be in so much trouble," I whispered as I looked around it the remains of the hotel room. Being prepared for the certainty that we were all going to be roaring drunk and having fun with hookers I had textbookedly booked us a suite at the famous Hen's party hotel, Caesars Palace. "Jesus Christ." My head felt like there was a drum pounding in it. I hated hangovers. I snuggled back down under the covers hoping a few more hours of sleep would make the pain go away. That was until I felt someone's hand curl across my waist. I pushed the covers off to reveal Breckin Meyer lying on the ground.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, wincing as I realised how loud my voice sounded.

'We were the entertainment." He whispered pulling the covers back over him.

"We?" I looked around the room spying what looked like Josh Duhamel, Mark Paul Gossamer, Bradley Cooper, Jeremy Renner, Robert Downey Jr, David Tennant, Matt Smith and Dominic Cooper lying in various places around the room.

"Oh Shit," I said as the events of the night before came back to me, I had brief flashes of dancing on the tables with a shirtless Bradley Cooper, playing strip poker with the boys, a lap dance with Jeremy Renner a drinking contest with Robert Downey jr, Ally, and Dominic Copper. Surprisingly I beat everyone But Dominic, Playing guitar with Mark Paul, playing drinking games with Josh Duhamel and the girls, Playing football with a pillow with Matt Smith and playing craps and then being piggybacked around the hotel by David Tennant and smashing walnuts and some very awful karaoke with Breckin. After that everything was just kind of a messy haze until everything goes black. I'm assuming that was when I must have passed out. I swore loudly as I remembered Jasmine,

"Ally wake up!" I ran over and started to pull her out from under Robert Downey Jr. "We've lost Jasmine," Ally swore as we rushed around the room, waking people up as until we found her lying peacefully in the corner with Corey Monteith.

"Huh," I said, softly. "I must have bought someone her age for her to play with." I rubbed my eyes as Breckin walked over and passed me a pack of Panadol. I popped two.

"Thanks!" I said softly as my head started to thunder less. Everyone pitched in and once the place was a little respectable I paid each of the stars. I tiredly rubbed my eyes as Breckin Meyer, Jeremy Renner, and David Tennant passed me their numbers and Robert Downey Jr passed me his to give to Ally. Zoe was already pocketing the numbers the Cooper boy's had given her.

"We're screwed." I said as Ally and I walked downstairs and flagged a cab. The girls were staying at Caesars until the wedding and the stars had already left for their respective flights.

"Why?" Ally asked, then she caught a look of our dresses, they were stained multi-coloured from what I hoped, was all the different alcohol we had consumed.

"Tony is going to murder us. Then Clint is going to kill me."

"We could sneak in." Ally suggested. As we crawled in the cab.

"Take us to the airport."

"Airport?" Ally asked, "Are we fleeing the country?"

"No but that is a really good idea." I said with a grin. "If we take a chopper to the Montecito, than we can abseil down to our floor, and crawl through the window."

"Or we can just take the elevator sneak into your suite grab a change of clothes, a shower and then see Tony and Clint." Ally suggested with a grin,

"That's a good idea too!" I said with a grin. "Driver to the Montecito!"

"Duck!" Ally said pulling us behind some tourists. "There's Ethan!" We shadowed the tourists, across the lobby, keeping to the shadows, until we ducked into the first available elevator!

"Home Clear." Ally and I said hi-fiving. That was until the doors opened on our floor revealing a pissed off looking Tony and a disapproving Clint.

"Busted." They said,

"Too late to flee the country?" Ally whispered to me.

"Yep." I said as we followed them resignedly into my suite.

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**Wolfsrainlover Hahaha Thanks. Hope you liked this one. Comiccrazygothgirl. *collects lucky charms* my precious... *Jex strokes the box. Iamtheblaze is in the corner eating them dry.* Booklover there is so much going down! WEDDINGS! I love them! DrBadAss Hahaha Thanks! **

**As all ways **

**Read and Review!**


	15. Caught red handed

"Out!" Tony ordered with a grin on his face. He was enjoying this far too much, I thought as Ally and I stepped resignedly out of the lift facing a smirking Clint and Tony.

"You take yours, I'll take mine?" Clint suggested, as Tony grinned pulling Ally into their room. The words 'you would never catch me doing something as irresponsible as this!' echoed back to me. I tiredly shook my head as Clint walked over and swept me in his arms bridal style. I snuggled my head into his thickly set chest as he slowly made his way down the thickly carpeted hall to our room.

"If this is punishment, you can punish me anytime!" I yawned as he pushed the door to my apartment open, casually sweeping into my room and placing me gently into my bed tucking the soft white covers around me.

"Not quite," Clint chuckled. "You still have that date with me tonight!" I groaned checking my watch, it was ten past ten. That gave me six hours sleep until I needed to be ready for our date. I was going to die, "Don't look so worried," he grinned, "Me being the world's best boyfriend in the world, pushed our reservations back an hour. I'll pick you up at ten to seven. Now," he passed me a small bottle of hangover cure, "Drink this, and get some sleep. I'll be back at seven." He knelt down and kissed my forehead. "Love you,"

"Love you to," I said before sculling the bottle and retching. "Hawkeye, this is terrible!" He smirked at me from the doorway.

"I know, now get some sleep!" I chuckled to myself and snuggled down under the covers. Seconds later as I was drowsing off and the sands of sleep clouding my eyes my phone rang, I reached over blindly and swiped

"Who dares interrupt my hung-over sleep?" I roared into the phone.

"I dare!" Ally's voice said half-heartedly into the phone. "Oh by the way, Tony say's he would never do something like this." I snorted,

"Remind him of his birthday party last year."

"He says that doesn't count. He was dying!"

"The flight he took to the military base with Rhodey!"

"He said you would say that and that don't count!"

"How does that not count?" I said as a stabbing pain shot through my head. "Oww never mind. My head hurts from thinking. What punishment did Tony give you?"

"You probably don't want to know, but it involves expensive lingerie, a bottle of chocolate sauce and a box of."

"I'm gonna stop you right there, you were right." I said cutting her off. "I really, really don't want to know!"

"What about you?"

"Well. Mine involves sleep, but not dirty sleep!" I said before she could jump in. "I have to go on a date tonight."

"See look who gets off the hook easy!"

"Shut up!" I grinned as someone rapped on my doorway. "Hold on there's someone at the door." I told her before placing the phone down on the bed beside me. "Go Away! I'm sleeping!" I screamed at the door before putting the phone back up to my ear.

"Harsh much." Ally said, but I could hear the laugh in her voice.

"Awh but I'm tired, do I really have to open the door."

"Yes, Jess you do!" I smirked pulling my way out of bed and made my way down the hall.

"I'm practically dying here, you do realise that." I said pulling the door open to reveal Natasha standing at my doorway in a torn dress, with mascara smudged over her eyes.

"We have a problem." I put the phone back up to my ear.

"Ally,"

"Yeah," She said curiously.

"You'd better get over here."

* * *

**My inbox just got spammed by people wanting me to update so here 'tis. Also opinions. I'm thinking of killing off Ally review with what you think?**

**CCGG. Fine I'll save some for Jex *crosses finger behind back...* Precious is all mine mwhahahahah. Booklover hahaha I wonder in deed... Wolfsrainlover, Hahaha thanks, what did you think of this chapter. . .In. Hahaha thanks, glad you like it. **


	16. Trouble in paradise

**I've had an inflock of PM's and reviews both for and against Ally's death. So to put the crowds to rest. Ally's safe. For now... Mwhahahah.**

* * *

"Natasha come on in," I grabbed her hand and dragged her into the living room. Thankfully, Hawkeye had probably told Ethan and his gang that I needed sleep. And more than likely threatened to break them if they woke me, so I had the apartment to myself. "Ally's on her way."

"Ally's here!" The girl in question said sliding into my lounge-room panting slightly, dressed in a pair of jeans and one of Tony's business shirts.

"Alright," I said throwing myself down on the couch opposite Natasha, Ally paused for a moment before following suit. "What's the big problem?"

"I lost Jasmine?" There was a minute of stunned silence where Ally and I stared at Natasha bewildered waiting for her to say April Fools. Or for a team with a camera to jump out of the shadows and say, 'You just got Loki'd'.

"You did what?" Ally asked as I said,

"I'm going to have to ask you to repeat yourself because it just sounded a hell of a lot like you said you lost Jasmine?"

"I did."

"Oh sweet mother of Jesus." Ally said as I whipped out my phone and sent a mass text, seconds later the avengers, with the addition of Ethan Hunt and his team were crowding into the living room.

"How could you lose her?" I asked incredulously, "Your Natasha Romanoff, you don't lose hostages." Cap glared at me, he, Thor and Bruce and flown down for Tony's bucks night. "I mean protection. That's why we gave her to you to watch. Because we do lose the people we get told to protect. Especially if we don't like them. And no" I glared at Ethan and Cap. "I didn't drop her off a cliff somewhere, not that it hasn't come across my mind. A lot."

"I didn't say anything," Ethan said holding his hands up in innocence.

"You didn't have to," I rolled my eyes.

"Wait. What's happened?" Bruce asked. Ally leant over and bought him up to date, "So basically we've lost the only job Fury gave you two to do whilst you were away, in a massive city, with absolutely no clue where she might have gone?"

"Not exactly," I said whipping out my trusty phone. "She does have a Stark 'tracking device' transmitting her location to my phone?"

"Jex." Ally said, "How does Jasmine have a Stark tracking device on her."

"I injected it into her ear whilst she was asleep." I said nonchalantly "What?" I asked as they all looked at me incredulously. "Why pay someone to test my inventions when I can just get you guys to do it whilst you're asleep. It saves us thousands of dollars in research money each year."

"I am never having a sleepover with you again." Ally said shaking her head,

"Awh come on," I said with a grin. "I would never test it on you per say, just other people." Ally rolled her eyes at me as Ethan coughed.

"Ladies can we have this discussion later, we do have a child to rescue and some bad guys to catch." I shook my head, checking the app I had installed in my phone.

"Well we don't have to go far."

"Why?" Ally asked me curiously, "Where are they keeping her."

"Here,"

"Here?" Tony asked glancing around; Natasha rolled her eyes making a noise that sounded like 'idiot'. "Hey," Tony said, "Uncalled for!"

"Kids." I called grabbing both their attention. "When your both quite finished, we have a child to rescue and then drop off a cliff?" I said hopefully, Cap gave me a flat look. "Too soon?" I sighed. "Okay it looks like she's in a room a couple of floors below us. Room 1921. I've hacked into CCTV and by the looks of things she hasn't been hurt or anything. What kind of idiots hold a hostage you've stolen in the same hotel, you took her from."

"The same kind of idiots who lose a hostage in the first place." Tony glared at Natasha, as I snorted with laughter, Cap gave him a flat look and Ally swiped at him.

"That was uncalled for Tony. Apologise to Natasha!" Now I wasn't the only one chuckling under my breath as Tony sulkily looked at Ally before glancing at Natasha and muttering.

"I'm sorry Natasha,"

"Alright," I grinned, "Now that we have that out of the way. Let's go save our hostage!"

* * *

**Woolfrainlover, thankyou she's safe, thanks for you vote. Also, have a nice day/night yourself. Booklover, Hahaha what did you think of this chapter? will they get her back? Guest, Okay! will do! . .In. Okay will do! and she's safe. CCGG. Hahaha Your psychic. *places hands on temples* I see an influx of reviews from your end. :) Make me proud! **

**Till next time, appologies for the late update. **

**valar morghulis, **

**Blaze!**


	17. Super Sexy Secret Agent

"Oh don't I feel all super sexy secret agent!" I told Ally as I stepped out of my bathroom dressed in a pair of thick black cargo pants, a black shirt and a black beret, paired off with the usual assortments of guns, grenades and Stark merchandise.

"You look all super sexy secret agent!" Hawkeye said walking into my bedroom as Ally rolled her eyes at him, finishing tucking her long blonde hair up into a thick plait, which she then folded into a tight bun.

"Excuse me whilst I choke back some super sexy secret agent vomit!" Ally said as I grinned,

"Awh come on don't tell me you don't do the same thing with my brother," I said as she grinned at me evilly,

"Oh I do, but when we do it there's usually a bedroom-" I cut her off,

"Eww! I don't want to hear about you and my brothers hot sex life. I may have given you my blessing, but that doesn't mean you have to tell me about it!"

"You're just jealous!" she said with a grin.

"Yes, because I secretly want to have raunchy sex with my brother,'" I shuddered as Hawkeye and Ally chuckled. "You can both pay for my extensive therapy now!" That shut them up. "I'm sorry about our date," I said to Hawkeye as I knelt down to tie my laces. "Losing a Hostage and all. Can we do it tomorrow?"

"Nope," Hawkeye grinned, "Tomorrow, I'm going to get absolutely pissed and play with a couple of hookers!"

"Tony's bachelor party," Ally informed me with a roll of her eyes, I grinned,

"You get one lap dance, nothing more!" Hawkeye grinned back at me.

"Don't worry love, there's only one girl I want to take my clothes off for in this room." Ally groaned as I said,

"Is that Ally?" I grinned, grabbing them both and pulling them out of the room. "Come on were going be late for Ethan's Super Secret Sundown Superhero Seminar." Ally rolled her eyes as I grinned, "I've been practising."

"I would ask where you got the time to think of these things, however I'm scared what the knowledge would reveal."

"That's a girl!" I grinned, as we walked into the living room which was now decked out with a bunch of laptops and a large 3D screens.

"Your late," Cap said as we breezed causally into the last available chairs,

"We're not late, you're all just really early," I informed him Cap rolled his eyes, about to give me a retort when the lights dimmed dramatically.

"Okay," Ethan clapped drawing everyone's attention towards him. "Here's how this is going to work," After Ethan had given us the low down on the plan he began to explain the various equipment to us. "This is a blow torch. We're going to use it to cut a hole in the window."

"Wait!" I said holding up my hands. "Isn't that a bit obvious, I mean, they're going to see that hole in the window and be like, They broke into my hotel room they're after my hostage!'

"Excuse me?" Ethan asked incredulously. "If you have a better Idea please… Share with the group." I rolled my eyes.

"That's easy." I said. "All you gotta do is take the glass out of the window."

"And how do you propose we do that?" Ethan asked me with a sigh. You'd be fed up too if it took you a whole afternoon to come up with a plan and someone with no experience started poking holes in it.

"You use this," I threw a small black ball on the table, "It'll take the window out of the wall, store it in there, then when you're done, you put it back." "What?" I asked, "It beats having to replace a window or two every time you want to play cricket or some other disastrous, potentially deadly ball game."

"Okay we'll use this then. If you're sure it will work?" I rolled my eyes at that, as Tony snorted with laughter.

"I'm a Stark, everything we invent works!"

"Okay," Ethan continued with his naming of the equipment with Tony and I occasionally replacing things with something we'd invented. "All right. Everybody good with the plan?" Ethan asked, we all nodded half-heartedly, "let's go save a hostage!"

* * *

**Hey guys, How's life. I was thinking about you a lot... (Creepy right.) While procrastinating from my assignments so I thought I'd spread some Joy :) (at least some people should be happy.)**

**Booklover Hahaha thanks, appreciate it. Have fun! Hahaha You just wait till the next chapter. Ally is not a happy camper. And Jex is well…. Jex. CCGG. I know right. I was like Nat jesus. You must have been reeeeaaaalllllyyyy drunk. Wait till the next chapter it's heaps better than Jex dropping her off a cliff. :)**

**Till next time, **

**See ya!**


	18. I don't remember this part f the plan

"I don't remember this as being part of the plan do you?" I asked Ally. We were sitting in a large ominous black helicopter, watching the world go by through a pair of hefty not to mention 'open' helicopter doors.

"No. I think I would have recalled being told that we were going to be jumping out of a perfectly good helicopter!" Ally glared at Ethan. He looked at me for support, I shrugged.

"She's right, I mean is it really necessary to risk our lives jumping out of a helicopter, when we have a member of the team who flies for god's sakes!" Ethan chuckled,

"You've never jumped out of a plane before have you?"

"Why would we? Was the plane falling out of the sky? No, so why jump from it!" Ally said slightly hysterical. I grinned,

"What she said, And like I said, older brother who flies, so it's never really been that much of a problem." I couldn't help but laugh at my best friend as she peered over the edge tentatively.

"It's so far down!" she informed me, I grinned,

"You know I am so tempted to push you right now."

"If you do, and I survive, I will break everyone in your entire body Jessica Stark," Natasha and Cap, who were flying the chopper laughed as I muttered something that sounded like 'touchy much'.

"Don't worry so much Ally." Tony's voice sounded over the com-link. "If your falling to your death, I'll catch you!" Declan was visibly laughing as Ally paled.

"Tony not helping." I said grinning. "And if you catch Ally whose going to catch your only sister?" I asked mock offended.

"I have two hands and besides if I drop you, your lover boy is waiting on the ground!"

"Alright people." A smirking Ethan came to Ally's rescue, "Let's keep these com-lines clear. And besides it's time to jump."

"Alright." Declan came over and did a quick check of my gear. "You know the plan?" he asked me as he tightened a couple of straps.

"No-Idea," I told him.

"Basically you and me jump, clear the window and secure the perimeter, Ethan and Ally arrive, you and Ally secure the hostage and bring her to me to get to the chopper, Ethan does a quick search, it's me and Ally up, you and Ethan put back the window and get bought back up to the chopper, we clear to land and that's it."

"Okay," I said biting my lip. "Now before we jump you should probably tell me how to use one of these!" I pointed to my chute.

"You don't know how to use a chute?" Declan asked incredulously.

"No genius I don't, why else would I be asking!" I rolled my eyes,

"Alright, when I give the signal," He held up a few fingers, "Pull these tabs here," he pointed to a pair of red tabs, "Don't pull the blue ones, the red ones!"

"Okay red tabs," I said nodding,

"This rope." He said pointing to the rope in question. "Should keep you attached to the building, but if not these loops will direct you left or right, forward or back." He said showing me the loops.

"Okay, rope and loops." I said trying to process the information.

"Good." Declan said and helped lead me to the side of the plane. "Ready?" he asked.

"To more than probably die a very painful death?" I asked, "Sure!"

"Awesome!" Declan grinned, as Ethan spoke over the coms. "Everyone in position. Luther, cameras are cut? Tony, Bruce, staff distracted? Clint, you ready on the ground? Natasha, Steve are we level?" There were a chorus of yes and even a 'Yes I have the body bags ready' from Clint. Ethan smirked and then began counting down. "Three, Two, One. Jump!" Ethan yelled, when he got to jump I felt a very sharp hand on my back pushing me out of the helicopter. I screamed as the air rushed past me whistling in my ears. Falling gracefully across from me was Declan who gave me a pulling motion. It took me a second to realise he meant chute, I grabbed the red tabs and pulled them. There was a moment of pain where the cute released ripping across the harness cutting into my upper body and began to slow my descent. I followed Declan manoeuvring myself up to the window. I made the mistake of looking down at the bright lights that were reflected below me, it took me a moment to realise that those small dots of light were cars. We were really high up.

"Jex it's okay!" Declan coached me. "Just take away the window and we can get inside." Right the window. I thought pulling the small device out of my pocket and starting it up. I pointed it at the window averting my eyes as the lasers passed over the window and the glass disappeared. Declan hauled himself in first and then helped to pull me onto the landing. Once I was safe and sound Declan grabbed his com-lick and whispered.

"Alright Ethan, Jex and I are going to begin securing the perimeter, your clear to jump." With that it was time for us to get to work.

* * *

**Woflsrainlover, You just wait. It's actually the next chapter but it's just as much as fun as pushing her off a cliff... Only she survives. **

**Till next time, **

**:) **

**Blaze. **


	19. PUSHED

"This is odd." I whispered to Declan as we started to scope the apartment.

"This is odd." he repeated back.

"Yeah, we've said that already," I informed creeping against the door and sliding a mirror underneath.

"It seemed worth repeating." He shrugged before whispering into his com. "How are we looking Luther?"

"Bad. Very Bad." Luther said back.

"What do you mean bad?" I asked,

"Bad as in, every single guard in that place is in the room where I'm assuming they're holding the hostage." Luther replied.

"Damn it!" I said swearing. "It's a bloody trap."

"Trap?" Declan asked curiously

"The idiots have tired to lure me out and it bloody well worked."

"It has?"

"Well I'm here aren't I. Oh well. Let's give them what they want." I said

"Blood hell!" Declan cried as a scream ripped through our com units. "What was that," he asked as we both stood up after dropping to the floor hands over our ears.

"Ally's jumped. Or was pushed!" I glared at him,

"Oh yeah, uh sorry about that?" he said sheepishly. "I wasn't sure if you were going to jump and we couldn't miss our window so I…"

"Pushed me out of an helicopter!" I whispered furiously. "Next time, warn a girl!"

"Yeah, okay, sorry." he pulled a face, I rolled my eyes.

"Your forgiven," I said as Ethan and Ally appeared behind us.

"He pushed me out of a helicopter!" Ally cried softly, scowling at Ethan.

"He's not the only one!" I said giving Declan a pointed look. Declan mouthed 'sorry' at me again. I grinned to show him that I was just teasing. "Ethan, We've been trapped."

"I heard. They must be trying to draw us out." Ethan mused.

"So let's give them what they want." I said with a grin. "And a little bit extra."

"There's no way to do this without harming one of the guards." Ethan sighed,

"So?" Ally asked flatly.

"We don't harm innocent people." Ethan snapped at her,

"They kidnapped an innocent albeit annoying girl. They deserve a few bruises!" Ally replied.

"Kids do you mind? A little silence if you please!" I shook my head at them before turning to Ethan and softly saying. "Ethan, look at it this way whatever we do to them is only going to be half as bad as what they do to Jasmine!" Ethan sighed.

"You have a point. But try be gently, do not engage unless they throw the first punch."

"Alrighty. Let's Do It." I said as we burst through the door storming down the hall and into the room where they were holding Jasmine.

"ahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahah." I let out the Tarzan cry storming into the room briefly aware of Declan staring at me from behind, "Oh sorry, you guys usually go for the silent storming the beach approach huh?"

"Something like that!" Declan replied with a grin. I think it was the sight of Declan and I standing their having a normal conversation in the face of the twenty or so guards that were packed in the kitchen, that stunned them into submission.

"So here's how this is going to work." Ally said with a grin. "I have a bomb strapped to my chest." she pointed at the grenade that had her watch tied to it. "Were going to take our hostage and go. Try and stop us and well, how should I put this Jex?"

"We'll blow this joint sky-high."

"Excellent. Now we'll just be taking our hostage." Ally and I crossed the room,

"Hi Jasmine!" I said cheerily as I untied her, and being a sophisticated young woman, I won't repeat what she said to me, but it starts with a F and ends in Off.

"That's not nice. I think we should leave her here." I said to Ally, who rolled her eyes and told me to hurry up untying her.

"Can I push her out the window at least?" I whispered to Declan as he tied her to the rope that would pull her up to the chopper.

"If you'll stop talking about me pushing you out of a helicopter, I'd give you the world." Declan said stepping back after positioning her in front of the window.

"Hey Jasmine. When you go back to school, make sure you tell all of your friends about the time Jess Stark pushed you out a window."

"When you what?" Jasmine said, as she turned around I pressed my hand into the small of her back, she let loose a scream as she dropped about a meter before Steve started to haul her into the chopper. The rest of us however had manual cables.

"That." I said to Ally with a grin. "Just made my life complete." Ally laughed as I unhitched my rope. "I will see the rest of you back at the room. I have some bad-guys to talk to."

"Wait. I want to come!" Ally said starting to unhitch her rope.

"No. I need my back up ready to rescue me, besides," I said grinning. "If I'm not out in ten, you have my full permission to come get me,"

"Alright. Look after yourself. I can't you jump I jump without my partner."

"I'll be fine. See you in ten!" I waved as the each jumped out of the window and started their ascent.

"Now," I crossed back into the room with the guards. "Where are your bosses?" The men pointed to the master bedroom. I walked over and casually knocked.

"Who is it?" came the muffled cry from inside.

"Room service,"

"We didn't order any-" Justin Hammer cracked open the door to reveal a psychotically grinning me leaning casually against the wall.

"Boy's. Mummy's home!"

* * *

**My uploads lately have been shocking. So a gift from me to you. Happy assessment season/holidays (depending on where you live.)**

**I hope your all happy! **

**Till next time, **

**Blaze. **


	20. It's on like Donkey Kong!

"Jacob it's her," Justin called, as I pushed him back walking into the lavish master bedroom, where Jacob was lounging on the bed. I choose to reside in the opulence of the comfortable couch that was pushed against the wall.

"Of course it is," I replied with a curt roll of my eyes. "Jacob, it's a pleasure to be working with a moderately professional criminal again, even one as dismal as yourself is a peach compared to that loser over there. But then again if you weren't here I would have had Justin behind bars by dinner, speaking of which why are you here?" I glance dismissively at Jacob who in turn gave me a wide grin.

"So nice of you to drop by Jessica. I was beginning to wane for your company. It is something one simply get's used to, like the smell of rotting fish." I rolled my eyes.

"Yet another low blow for team Jacob. Tell me my dear, do you think of those cliché's yourself or does the internet do that for you?"

"It is always a charm Jessica,"

"As with you, now tell me. Was it really necessary to kidnap my hostage in order to see me, surely you know you could have called. Or stolen someone else's hostage."

"What would have been the fun in that. And besides now you are here, on my turf, on my grounds."

"No. We're on my turf, I was at the Montecito first. By the way, what on earth made you decide to pick the exact same hotel I was staying at to kidnap my hostage. Couldn't you have been a little more inventive?"

"No Vacancies, This was the only place we could find that would take us and all of our henchmen."

"Ouch, tough break." I said. "Now back to my previous question. Was it really necessary to steal my hostage?"

"Yes. I believe it was, we did try email you."

"Really?" I asked, "You should have tried Facebook. I always, without fail, check my Facebook!"  
"Thankyou, I'll remember that next time I wish to have a chat with you."

"Wonderful, we really must get together more often I really do miss your company." I said giving him a charming smile.

"Why are you talking to her. Where's the guns, the threats, the pain! You said you were going to make her pay!" Justin exploded from the corner.

"Patience." I told Justin. "Those come later, now we catch up, discuss the latest new from the criminal underworld. The colour of throw pillows this season and the latest pop sensations."

"Do not interrupt me again." Jacob regarded him coldly.

"What on Earth possessed you to work with him of all people Jacob, even I know your worth more criminal that that!"

"Money," Jacob sighed. "Someone needed to bankroll this party, as you well know Jessica, Money makes the world turn."

"Unfortunately that's true. We'll I hope he hasn't driven you too insane. Oh but he's right we may have to speed this up to the threats and weapons, my backup should be along soon."

"Well it was a pleasure chatting with you again Jessica."

"As always the pleasure is mine Jacob, when your not trying to kidnap or maim me, your quite a nice fellow." I sighed, "I do miss having a quiet cup of tea with the villains before sending them to jail. What has our profession come to when you don't have time for tea?"

"I quite agree, but I do suppose I should start threatening you and such."

"Quite right. I'm going to put you away for a long time Jacob."

"I will make you pay for what you did to me!" Jacob shook his fist at me.

"So that's what this is a revenge job. You really shouldn't do those, feelings always get messy in revenge jobs. That reminds me," I said with a grin. "Fury wants to know how you escaped jail,"

"Light guard." He smirked at me.

"Cool thanks, I'll let him know. Now Jacob. In about three seconds an irate bride to be is going to bust down that door and send your pansy arse to jail. Before that happens, I've got to ask you a question, will you go peacefully,"

"The bruises are still fresh from last time," he grinned holding out his hands, "Cuff me,"

"Atta boy!" I grinned walking over and trying his wrist together with a few cable ties.

"Cable ties?" he held up his cuffed hands. "Where's the trust?" I chuckled before turning to Hammer holding the ties.

"Easy way or the hard way?"

"Bring it." Hammer sneered at me dropping into a fighting stance.

"It's on like Donkey Kong." I said walking over to him, "Is that all you got?" I remarked as I dodged his clumsy punch. Hammer didn't reply breathing heavily as I leapt up on one foot smashing my other into his face in a solid round-house kick. Hammer screamed as they're was the unmistakable crunch of bone on bone contact. His nose squirted like a Scarlett fountain as he dropped to the ground moaning in pain I sunk my fist into the soft part of his stomach causing him to cry out. "That's for Tony." I repeated my action. "That one's for Rhodey." As he sat immobilised and winded I sunk my knee into his chin. "And that's for trying to hurt my family." As I pulled out the cable ties the bedroom door fell to the ground and in burst Ally.

"Sorry I'm late I had a bit of guard trouble." I peered behind her to see the piles of bloodied and unconscious guards.

"You took them all out?" I asked curiously. Ally shrugged

"One of them made fun of my dress."

"Why am I not surprised." I grinned finishing the ties around Hammers fist. "C'mon let's get out of here before security shows up."

* * *

**I'm back from school camp! Did you miss me?**

**Booklover, hahaha course it did. In fact they're are several things I'd like to push out a window! **

**Wolfsrainlover! Hahaha I'm glad someone liked that bit! **

** . .IN Hahaha Thanks, really appreciate it! **

**Till next time, **

**A very tired and camped-out. **

**Blaze!**


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